Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am
What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let
the children play outside.
How teething babies wash their chins.
One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance
apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster
The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the
name: What you call your child when you're mad at him.
The people who think your children are wonderful even though
they're sure you're not raising them right.
What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
How we want our children to be as long as they do everything
out: What it's too late for your child to do by the time you
When your life was still somewhat your own.
childbirth: A contradiction in terms.
A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing
dry shoes into it.
off: A child who is more talented than yours.
What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and
to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
The distance required between the supermarket aisles so that
children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.
tantrums: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset
bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman
warning: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to
make those familiar grunting noises.
Able to whine in words
None of the kids that live in your house.
An exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge."
for Medical Terms
Artery -- Study of paintings
Bacteria -- Back door of cafeteria
Barium -- What doctors do when treatment fails
Bowel -- Letter like A.E.I.O.U
Caesarean section -- District in Rome
Cat scan -- Searching for kitty
Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her
Colic -- Sheep dog
Coma -- A punctuation mark
Congenital -- Friendly
D&C -- Where Washington is
Diarrhea -- Journal of daily events
Dilate -- To live long
Enema -- Not a friend
Fester -- Quicker
Fibula -- A small lie
G.I. Series -- Soldiers' ball game
Grippe -- Suitcase
Hangnail -- Coathook
Impotent -- Distinguished, well known
Intense pain -- Torture in a teepee
Labor pain -- Got hurt at work
Medical staff -- Doctor's cane
Morbid -- Higher offer
Nitrate -- Cheaper than day rate
Node -- Was aware of
Outpatient -- Person who had fainted
Pelvis -- Cousin of Elvis
Post operative -- Letter carrier
Protein -- Favoring young people
Rectum -- It almost killed him
Recovery room -- Place to do upholstery
Rheumatic -- Amorous
Scar -- Rolled tobacco leaf
Secretion -- Hiding anything
Seizure -- Roman emperor
Serology -- Study of knighthood
Tablet -- Small table
Terminal illness -- Sickness at airport
Tibia -- Country in North Africa
Tumor -- An extra pair
Urine -- Opposite of you're out
Varicose -- Located nearby
Vein -- Conceited