There were 3 guys stranded in the mountains and they weren't going to be rescued for 3 days. So they all made a plan that each night one would get the food. So the first night the 1st guy goes out and comes back with a big deer. So the guy who was hunting tomorrow ask for advice on how to catch another one, and the guy said see tracks, follow tracks, BAM!! shot the deer... So the next night the 2nd guy went out and came back with an even bigger deer than the 1st guys, and the 3rd guy was amazed so he asked how he could catch one like that for the next night. And the guy told him see tracks, follow tracks, BAM!! shot the deer... The next night the 3rd guy went out to get a deer and comes back hours later all beat up and bloody, so the the other 2 guys ask what happen. And the guy said i seen tracks, followed tracks, BAM!! got hit by train.
Two guys go hunting. Jerry has never gone hunting while Joe has hunted all his life. When they get to the northern Wisconsin woods, Joe tells Jerry to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Joe checks out a deer stand. After he gets about a quarter of a mile away, Joe hears a blood-curdling scream. He rushes back to Jerry and yells, "I thought I told you to be quiet!" Jerry says, "Hey, I tried. I really did. When those snakes crawled over me, I didn't make a sound. When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn't make a peep. But when those two chipmunks crawled up my pants leg and said, 'Should we take them with us or eat them here?' I couldn't keep quiet any more!"
Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a foolproof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot the bull. They set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, donned their costume and began to give the moose love call. Before long, their call was answered as a bull came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. When the bull was close enough, the guy in front said, "Okay, let's get out and get him." After a moment that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouted, "The zipper is stuck! What are we going to do?" The guy in the front says, "Well, I'm going to start nibbling grass, but you'd better brace yourself."